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-> The Sky is Falling
The Sky is Falling
Do you remember the story of Chicken Little? One day she was walking
through the woods when an acorn fell on her head. “Oh no!”
she said. “The sky is falling. I must run and tell the king!”
On her way to the king's palace, Chicken Little met Henny Penny
who was going into the woods to hunt for worms. But Chicken Little
said, “Oh no, don't go! I was just there and the sky fell
on my head! Come with me to tell the king." So Henny Penny
joined Chicken Little and they went along as fast as they could
to tell the king. Soon they met Cocky Locky who joined them as soon
as he heard and then Goosey Poosey joined them and they all went
along as fast as they could to tell the king that the sky was falling.
Well, despite the fact that I grew up with this little children’s
story, I evidently didn’t learn its lesson because I’ve
been realizing that I still act like Chicken Little. This has become
evident to me as I have been become aware of fears: unconscious,
deep-seated fears that cause me to panic or to react very strongly
emotionally to a situation that did not warrant it. One little rejection,
one little disappointment, one small failure and, if it is connected
to those deep-seated fears, I am suddenly under a falling sky: I’m
never going to get that position, I’m never going to find
someone, I’m never going to reach my dreams.
Fortunately, I am not alone in my Chicken Little syndrome. I hear
words like these coming out of mouths everywhere I turn: “Why
does everything have to be so hard?” “ I feel so worthless.”
“I am never going to get this right.” Perhaps even you
know that feeling that everything seems like it’s falling
apart. It may be a small event that elicits this response, but it
taps into something that runs very deep and overwhelming; and when
we touch it, it does feel like the sky is falling. What’s
even worse is that we begin to interpret events, words, everything
around us in the same light so that it just reinforces our concept.
This doesn’t only happen with difficult things. Ever notice
how one little thing changes your entire outlook? An email in the
morning has you dreaming throughout the day. A special nod from
the boss has you more motivated than ever. “All of our dreams
are going to come true.” “We will find that happiness
we have been searching for.” But then something happens that
isn’t in line with our concept of happiness, success, or love;
we tap into those fears of failure, loneliness and sadness, and
once again the sky falls.
It is hard to change these patterns. These fears run through the
core of our being and to face them and deal with them takes courage,
patience and gentleness—not necessarily qualities that spring
to mind when facing one’s demons. Generally we want to run
and hide. We turn to things to comfort us, support us, distract
us so we don’t have to face the darkness and the unknown.
However, until we face them and deal with them, they control us
and plague us. We are never really free of them; they are always
deep down in the bottom of our hearts and so we are never truly
at peace and in joy.
There are various characteristics of these fears that must be addressed
in order to begin to be free of them. Perhaps the number one tool
is to stay in the present. Many times our fears are based on past
hurts in combination with our imagination magnifying that hurt many
times over. It renders us incapacitated with the fear of that imagined
hurt. We never could handle that amount of pain so we panic and
run. Don’t want to get smashed under the falling sky! But
generally, the present moment isn’t as bad as we feared: we
are not completely out of money in this moment; we do have people
that care and love us in this moment; I am okay in this moment.
Another part of the sky is falling is that what we want is not
being given to us in the way that we want it. We sink into our fear
because what is, is not in the way that we wanted and so we feel
we will never get what we want. We want to be loved but in the form
of a partner; so though we have people who love us, we are lonely
because we don’t have a partner. We want to be respected and
want it in the form of a promotion. But though we have colleagues
that honor us and our work, we are dissatisfied because we did not
get the position we sought.
This ties into staying in the moment and accepting it. By not attaching
to something that we like or want, we are able to appreciate and
enjoy it for what is and not be devastated if it passes. By not
resisting what is and denying its impact on us, we can look at it,
acknowledge our fears and begin to choose our responses instead
of reacting out of panic and non-thinking.
Of course our precious yoga mat is a place to practice this. We
have the opportunity to face poses that cause our breath to quicken
and our thoughts to race. But by staying with the moment through
the breath, we can play with our limitations and fears and begin
to look at them for what they are and see their true nature. As
we open and stretch our bodies, we recognize fear when it causes
us to contract and seize. Then instead of surrendering to that habit,
we choose to re-open, to breathe and look up. We are able to see,
in this moment, that it was a raindrop and nothing more.
Heather Antonissen, October 2002
You can write to Heather at heather@yogaisyouth.com
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