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The Art of NOT Letting Go

Sometime ago I wrote an article called The Art of Letting Go. A short time after, I was sitting at my computer and the words, "the art of NOT letting go" came to me. I jotted them down not knowing why. Some days later as I pondered their meaning, something important became clear to me.

I was a master at not letting go, as I believe so many of us are. We hold onto anger, resentment, jealousy and many other limiting emotions and reactive behaviors generated by our past experiences. Often we think we have dealt with these emotions only to find out much later they still reside within us. Clients are shocked to find emotions and memories of past events stored in their body without having any consciousness awareness of their existence. This is like someone "flipping your switch"  and you end up responding completely out of proportion to the event or person. Later you ask yourself, "Why did I react that way?". The stored energetic pattern was activated by the other person’s actions or words and that triggered the old pattern or memory. Have you ever had a reaction in the present moment in which your response was based entirely on a similar event that happed from your past? Of course you have because every reaction you have is based on a past experience. This is why we find it so hard to live in the present moment. We have lost the ability to let go like a child who can be crying after falling and a few seconds later be laughing. These types of energetic patterns hold us back from reaching our full potential and they steal our energy.

My journey always takes me back to the body as one of the ways for me to develop my spiritual growth and create a stronger connection with who I really am, a spiritual being having a human experience. Society teaches us that our spiritual connection comes from somewhere out there, outside of ourselves. I never understood this concept as I was growing up. I have come to realize that this connection can be deeply influenced by incorporating the knowledge, information and healing of the physical body during our spiritual journey. When we do this we not only accelerate our journey but we reap the benefits of physical and emotional healing. We must no longer take our bodies for granted and ignore the information they have to offer us.

“Ram Dass talks of how his first spiritual goal was to be rid of his physical existence. He came to understand, though, that our spirituality lies in bringing higher consciousness to our world of form. When we can do so, we can delight in all aspects of creation.

Soul exists in the balance of spirit and matter. For a soulful life, we pay attention to both, seeing spiritual qualities in material forms. As our awareness grows, we begin to use consciousness to influence and create form. It’s through form that our spirit expresses.”

The Daily Guru

The first way to begin to change anything in our lives is through awareness. As an alcoholic, I did not believe I had a problem. It took many years to realize that I did, and through this awareness, I could take the necessary steps to change my life.

Over time, we disconnect from our body. Who wants to feel pain? Moreover, I am not just talking about physical pain. Emotional pain has the same affect on the body, locking in behavioral patterns. We teach ourselves to disconnect little by little until one day we end up in a place we never thought we would be. It is like the brakes on our car. We do not realize how bad they are until they start squeaking. Once we take the car in for repair and begin to use the brakes again we realize just how bad they were, even long before they started squeaking. How disconnected have you become from you life and body. What has to start squeaking before you notice?

Your body is one of the greatest gifts you were given in this life. Going into partnership with the body and treating it as you would want to be treated by someone else can change your life. Yes, treat your body as if it were another person. We all take our bodies for granted and mistreat it at some point in our lives. Let’s be honest, sometimes on a daily basis. Yet it is still with us like a trusted friend always doing the best it can for us. Shouldn’t we be doing the same for it?

Beginning to learn from your pain and fear can bring you great rewards and put you on a path to healing from any dis-ease or disease in your life. Do not run from your pain and fear but seek them out as the friends and teachers they are meant to be. Remember to question authority, acquire knowledge and awareness. Be open to changing your mind, beliefs and direction as you receive new information. Remaining empowered during your healing journey is paramount to manifesting your desired outcome. Learn to reconnect with your body by exploring bodywork, yoga and any other modality that brings you new awareness, joy and freedom.

Finally try this short meditation to begin brining awareness back into you body. Remember no matter how relaxed you believe yourself to be you can always go to a deeper more relaxed state.

Find a quiet place to sit or lie down. Turn the phone off and make sure you will not be disturbed. Close your eyes and begin to scan your body. Find one place that speaks the loudest to you. It may feel painful or just tight and uncomfortable. Most people will not be able to relax this place. In fact, the more attention you place on this spot the more it will hurt in most cases. Begin to scan away from this point looking for other areas in your body that are tight that you can relax. For example, maybe your low back is tight and hurts. As you begin to scan around you find that you are clinching your left fist and the glut/buttocks muscles are tight. You relax these places and notice the back pain eases. You continue to scan the rest of your body looking for new places to relax away from the original spot. Always remembering to revisit the places you previously found because they will often tighten up again. Keep repeating this process for several minutes or as long as you can. If you continue to practice this exercise, you will be able to do it at any time and in any situation. It can bring more peace and ease into you body and life. Over time, it will retrain your muscles and body to be in a more relaxed state and to respond to your intention immediately.

Tim Custis , April 2006

You can write to Tim at tim@spiralrelease.com, and check out his website SpiralRelease.com

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